Blog #12 - Naples

The article Queer Parenting for the New Millennium, by Nancy Naples, discusses the controversies surrounding same sex marriages and parenting. George Bush said in 2004 that, same sex marriage “would undermine the welfare of children and the stability of society.” Naples addresses this statement by arguing that poverty, not gay marriage is the main factor that contributes to the instability of families. She blames President Bush for faulting same sex marriages while ignoring the more significant underlying issues that cause family insecurity. What makes same sex marriages more susceptible to poverty are the laws supported by President Bush, such as the Temporary Assistance to Needy Families. This law provides monetary assistance for lower income parents who are in traditional heterosexual marriages, while ignoring the needs of individuals in same sex relationships who are prohibited to marry. Therefore needy parents who are in homosexual relationships are not entitled to the same benefits afforded to heterosexual married couples. Naples also discusses some of the difficulties and barriers presented to gay parents. She details the alienation felt by non-biological comothers who are forced to explain their relationships with their children. Comothers also experience a detachment from society. The pregnant partner becomes more accepted by society because she shares a commonality with heterosexual mothers (pregnancy), while the comother is considered the other. Naples closes her article with the same idea that Paula Ettelbrick discussed in her article, Since When Is Marriage a Path to Liberation. Both authors discuss the problem of rights without justice, which is the idea that assigning homosexuals more legal privileges will not create social acceptance. Naples states that, “it is unlikely that by itself legal change will create acceptance or transform dominant cultural values.” To improve society’s view of homosexuality, we need to question compulsory heterosexuality and gender norms. The best way to benefit same sex couples would be to promote societal acceptance rather than push for the rights to marriage.

A domestic partnership is a legal relationship between two individuals who live together and share a common domestic life, but are neither joined by marriage or a civil union. In New York State there are three ways that a couple can gain domestic partnership status. 1- by having registered with some jurisdiction that provides a registration system for domestic partners, such as one of the cities or counties in New York State with domestic partnership registries; 2 - by being a person's designated partner for employee benefits purposes at work; or 3 - the catch-all category, by being able to provide documentation of dependence or mutual interdependence, mainly along financial lines. The New York State law allowing domestic partnerships includes such rights as providing that a decedent's domestic partner will take priority over anybody except a person specifically designated in a will or a special designation of agent for this purpose. The law also includes the right to control the disposition, including burial, interment or cremation, of the remains of such decedent and all reasonable costs associated therewith and the disposition of any part of the decedent's body. Therefore, surviving domestic partners will take priority over surviving adult children, surviving parents, surviving adult siblings, surviving guardians or estate property.